Anxiety, Overthinking? Meet Byron Katie’s Four Questions and a Better Way to Live
Our brains are like toddlers with glitter — they love making a mess.
That’s why, as a therapist in Tampa, I love using cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to help clients clean up the chaos of irrational thinking.
If your mind feels like a hamster on a caffeine bender—looping through worries, what-ifs, and worst-case scenarios—you’re not alone. Overthinking is one of the most common cognitive traps people find themselves in, often leaving us exhausted, anxious, and disconnected from reality (Leahy, 2017). While cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) offers effective techniques for challenging irrational thoughts (Beck, 2011), there’s also a beautifully simple approach created by author and teacher Byron Katie that’s worth exploring: The Work.
What Is 'The Work'?
Byron Katie introduced 'The Work' in her book Loving What Is (Katie & Mitchell, 2002). It's a form of self-inquiry consisting of four deceptively simple questions designed to challenge the truth and impact of your thoughts. Katie encourages us to meet our beliefs with curiosity rather than judgment.
Byron Katie’s Loving What Is (2002) and her Four Questions are powerful:
Is it true?
Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
How do you react when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without that thought?
The Turnaround: Where the Real Mind-Bending Magic Happens
After going through these questions, you apply a 'turnaround'—rephrasing the original thought in a way that points back at yourself, the opposite person, or the opposite belief. This isn't about blame—it's about finding new, empowering perspectives (Katie, 2008).
For example, if the original thought is, “She doesn’t respect me,” the Turnaround could be:
“I don’t respect me.”
“I don’t respect her.”
“She does respect me.”
You explore each new version with curiosity, not judgment, to find examples where it might also be true.
It’s like reality-check yoga for your brain: flexible, humbling, and surprisingly freeing.
As Byron Katie puts it, “The turnaround is your prescription for happiness.”
In therapy, Turnarounds pair beautifully with cognitive behavioral strategies to help clients challenge thoughts and re-author their story.
It’s basically Marie Kondo for your brain — but instead of decluttering closets, we’re decluttering all the “I'm not good enough” and “everything will implode” thoughts you never needed to store.
The benefits?
Less spiraling, more stability.
Less doom-scrolling, more doing.
Less drama, more “I’ve got this.”
Katie writes, "It's not the problem that causes our suffering; it's our thinking about the problem."
(Cue the collective, slightly uncomfortable, but knowing sigh.)
Why It Works
Katie’s process aligns well with the core principles of CBT, which focuses on identifying and reframing distorted thinking patterns that contribute to emotional distress (Beck, 2011). Both methods help us recognize that we don’t have to believe every thought we think, especially the ones that spiral into stress, guilt, or shame.
Let’s Work Through It
If overthinking is taking up way too much space in your head, therapy can help you sort through the noise with tools like CBT and guided inquiry. At The Way is Through, I offer compassionate, creative support to help you challenge limiting beliefs and reclaim your peace of mind.
Ready to turn down the volume on your inner drama queen (or king)? Therapy might just be your next best plot twist.
Are you in Florida and looking for a psychotherapist? Click here to book a session, and let’s start cleaning up the mental glitter.
📚 References
Beck, J. S. (2011). Cognitive Behavior Therapy: Basics and Beyond (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.
Katie, B., & Mitchell, S. (2002). Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life. Harmony Books.
Katie, B. (2008). Question Your Thinking, Change the World: Quotations from Byron Katie. Hay House, Inc.
Leahy, R. L. (2017). The Worry Cure: Seven Steps to Stop Worry from Stopping You. Harmony.
